When we think about what we want, we usually don’t include what we already have.



When we practice wanting what we already have, complaining goes out the window.



People often say that they don’t want to do what they are doing, and yet, they wouldn’t be doing it if they really didn’t want to, deep down.



It is interesting to think about. When people DO stuff, they actually prove that they want to do those things, because they are casting their vote with their actions.



People actually only DO things that they actually want to do. Sometimes we tell ourselves that we don’t want to do stuff, and yet when we really look at it closely, we actually DO want to do what we are doing, even if we are complaining about it.


Think about the parent who complains about going to work, doing the laundry, the dishes, the carpooling. Actually, none of this HAS to be done. None of it.



You can stop doing dishes. You can stop taking your kids to school. You can quit your job. All of that is optional.



Yes. There will be consequences that we may not like when we quit doing those things. Child services may be called. You may be accused of neglect. You may not be able to pay your bills. And yet, this is entirely optional for us to choose.



When we choose to do stuff, it is SUPER helpful to own that you actually WANT to do many of the things that you complain about doing. OWN that you don’t HAVE to do any of it and start to acknowledge that you are choosing to do these things. So why not acknowledge to yourself that you actually do WANT to do these things?



You WANTED to have children. You WANTED to be married, You WANTED to get your job. Now stop complaining about all of these things and own that you actually still WANT these things and all that comes with it.



When we feel like we are forced to do stuff, we are lying to ourselves.



Thinking we are compelled to do something is actually a lie, too.



Face it and be responsible for that which you have chosen. You are choosing it.



Choosing to do something and then complaining about it is futile. It is actually you creating your own misery.



Deciding you want kids and then complaining about raising them, is not helpful. Own what you wanted in the past that you now have. 


Practice wanting what you have and who you already are and learn to appreciate everything that comes with it. And if you can’t get to appreciation, at least do your best to get to neutral. It will change so much for you.



If you wanted a family, STOP complaining what comes along with having a family.



If you wanted to have a job, STOP complaining about your job.



My coach, Brooke, always says to never leave any situation until you can be happy in that situation and THEN make the choice to leave. There is much wisdom in this advice. Why would that be? I would like you to do some thinking about that one.



Gratitude is actually the opposite of victim mentality. When you are grateful, it is almost impossible to feel sorry for yourself.


I would encourage all of you to practice being grateful consciously every day. Maybe do some thought downloads on what you are grateful for and perhaps what you currently aren’t grateful for that you could choose to be grateful for.



Practice WANTING what you already have.



A grateful heart is a happy heart.


And at the end of the day, if you discover that there are things you’d like to change, then consider that you have the courage inside of you just waiting for you to step into something new.


Need some help looking at what you want to keep in your life, what you’d like to stop complaining about, or how to choose something different for yourself? Click on link on my homepage for a free consultation. Let’s get you some relief and actually a little bit of joy in your life. It’s about time, right?